Eight Steps Toward Restoring Love, Sex and Intimacy with Dr. Janis Rozler
Dr. Janis Roszler is a licensed marriage and family therapist, board-certified sex therapist, registered/licensed dietitian, master-level addiction professional (MCAP), and award-winning medical media producer. She is currently an instructor at the International Institute of Clinical Sexology and has a private therapy practice in Miami, Florida. In this episode, she talks about intimacy more than just being sexual. She shares seven different types of intimacy that don’t necessarily lead into the bedroom and the value of taking time off from being sexual with your partner.
TAKEAWAYS:
[1:50] A little bit about Dr. Janice and where she and Dr. Rob got connected.
[3:35] Intimacy is not only sexual. Dr. Janice talks about the other seven types of intimacy.
[5:40] How can affection be different from the affection you have for a friend?
[7:25] Dr. Janice also shares what physical activities partners can do together that are not sexual.
[10:45] What is spiritual connection?
[11:30] Dr. Rob shares what intellectual connection means for him and his husband.
[12:25] Another way to connect is social. Dr. Janice explains further.
[13:20] Emotional connection is when you share your feelings about something. Dr. Janice talks about “I” statements when sharing your feelings.
[16:05] These other areas of intimacy can help you grow your sex life. Dr. Janice explains how.
[19:20] Can people with differences come together in a passionate way without disagreement?
[23:20] Relationships are not magic. Dr. Janice shares the ups and downs of her 40-year marriage.
[26:15] Sensuality vs sexuality. Dr. Janice tells the difference.
[29:45] How do you get to sex by not having sex? Dr. Janice talks about the value of couples not being sexual for a period of time.
[30:33] Addiction vs yearning. How do you differentiate the two?
[35:33] Dr. Janice summarizes the eight types of intimacy and how to use them to connect with your partner.
RESOURCES:
Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men
Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency
QUOTES:
- “Intimacy is not only sexual.”
- “We’re talking about building the wealth of friendship, not just sexual partners. But we hope that the person you are involved with is also a friend with whom you have a deep connection with.”
- “Esthetic connection means that you view something of beauty together. You experience it at the same time.”
- “You’re not blaming, you’re not saying ‘Look what you did’, you’re just sharing your feelings. And the thing with feelings is that they are never wrong.”