#133 - Speaking to Be Heard (Part 2 of a Deeper Dive Into the Talking Boundary)

If you haven’t heard last week’s episode yet, I recommend listening to that one too if you’re interested in this exploration of the talking boundary. In that episode, I covered what the talking boundary is, and what talking boundary violations look like. This time, I’ll move into what it looks like when you have a healthy, effective talking boundary. I’ll also share some questions to ask yourself to help ensure your talking boundary is in great shape.   Biggest Takeaways From Episode #133: The first way to use a healthy talking boundary is to say what you would like or what you want, instead of saying what the other person did that you didn’t like. Another important way to use your talking boundary in a healthy way is to lead with agreement. Mastering your listening boundary will also help you develop a strong, healthy talking boundary. Here are some questions to ask yourself when you’re using the talking boundary:  Is the other person in a position to really hear me and take in what I’m saying? What response do I expect to get from this person? Do I need to speak my truth regardless of the response? Can I express what I want to say in a way that’s completely about me? Would it be better if I waited for 24 hours to say what I want to say?   Highlights from Episode #133: Did you catch last week’s episode? This one continues the exploration of the talking boundary that Vicki started then. [00:39] Vicki shares some thoughts on the question behind the question, “Are talking boundary violations verbal abuse?” [04:09] We learn the first way to use a healthy talking boundary, with Vicki offering an example from her own life. [07:27] Vicki offers some general questions to ask yourself before you speak. [13:07] It’s important to think of what your intention is before you express yourself, Vicki points out. [23:47] Leading with agreement is the second way to use a healthy talking boundary. [26:36] We learn about how one-word responses (or even silence) can work. [29:24] Vicki explains that mastering the listening boundary is the best way to strengthen your talking boundary. [32:15]   Links and Resources: Vicki’s monthly Boundaries Clarifier Workshops Vicki Tidwell Palmer Vicki Tidwell Palmer on Facebook Moving Beyond Betrayal by Vicki Tidwell Palmer 5-Step Boundary Solution Clarifier Vicki Tidwell Palmer on Instagram The Radiant Threefold Path Beyond Bitchy on Spotify Beyond Bitchy Podcast | Episode #37 – The Listening Boundary Part I  Beyond Bitchy Podcast | Episode #39 – The Listening Boundary Part 2: How It Works Beyond Bitchy Podcast | Episode #40 – The Listening Boundary Part 3: High Quality Listening = Higher Quality Responses  Beyond Bitchy Podcast | Episode #132 – She Said What?! Part I of A Deeper Dive Into the Talking Boundary

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