#27 - When You've Got Nothing But a Hunch, Can You Set a Boundary?
Today’s episode was inspired by a listener’s great question. She was completing a 5-Step Boundary Solution Clarifier, and while working through Step 1 (Knowing Your Reality), she realized she only had a hunch, rather than any hard data. She wanted to know if intuition, or a gut feeling, is enough to go on when you want to set a boundary. In general, the answer is “yes,” but you need to know some specifics before proceeding. Biggest Takeaways From Episode #27: Intuition is "the ability to understand something immediately without the need for conscious reasoning, or a thing that one knows or considers likely from instinctive feeling rather than conscious reasoning." You may think that you don’t have data to back up an intuition, but often in hindsight you may realize there was specific evidence that lead to your gut feeling. It is possible to substitute an intuitive hunch or a gut feeling for data in Step 1 when you’re working through a 5-Step Boundary Solution Clarifier, and then proceed from there with the boundary you want to create. When you’re creating a boundary based on intuition or a gut feeling, the intuition or hunch is the data in Step 1 of the 5-Step Boundary Solution Clarifier. Your thoughts or perceptions about the data and the data itself are usually synonymous. The only difference between how you would typically complete a 5-Step Boundary Solution Clarifier and completing one based on a hunch or intuition, is that in Step 1, the hunch is the data and the thought. Highlights from Episode #27: Vicki explains the inspiration for today’s episode, then digs into what intuition is and explores different ways of orienting to and taking in data. [00:54] We learn about why intuition and different ways of orienting to the world are important when it comes to boundaries. [07:42] Vicki talks about some situations where you want to set a boundary and you don’t have any data, but need to proceed from your intuition instead. [09:08] Vicki offers a hypothetical situation to use as an example of creating boundaries based on intuition. [13:16] We hear how to finish the steps of the 5-Step Boundary Solution in this example. [17:34] Vicki shares more information on using intuition to create a boundary. [24:14] Most people tend to default to not paying attention to their intuition, Vicki points out. [30:02] Links and Resources: Vicki Tidwell Palmer Moving Beyond Betrayal by Vicki Tidwell Palmer 5-Step Boundary Solution Clarifier Beyond Bitchy Podcast | Episode 10 (Step 1 of the 5-Step Boundary Solution)