People Pleasing
How do you know if you’re being a really nice and giving person, and engaging in people pleasing? Overcommitting, not having enough time for yourself, feel consumed by your job or your relationships; these thins may take a toll on your health. Just because you have the time does NOT mean you have the capacity. Sally’s message to all the people pleasers of the world: Practice saying no and remember that you’re kind of being an asshole when you’re always saying yes. It can be difficult to identify feelings, even for adults. Rudimentary engaging with your body and mind may be a good place to start. One of Sally’s favorite times to find stillness is in the morning. Side note: This may feel awful for an anxious person. If this is you, try a little therapy! People pleasing moves us further toward invisibility. If you’re invisible, you can’t be criticized, and for some criticism can be debilitating. Practice taking up space! Sally recommends standing up in the middle of a movie and walking out of the theater. Without being rude, practice inconveniencing and possibly bothering others. If you’re always putting yourself in other people’s shoes, and you’re unable to show yourself the same kind of compassion, this reinforces the story of ‘I’m not worth anything.’ What is the opposite of invisibility? Being seen? Being heard? To be known and loved for who you we truly are with all of our flaws and vulnerabilities! It’s not in the disappointments, but in the reparations that creates resiliency in relationships. We have two voicemails this week and they’re SO GOOD! If you’d like to record a question or a comment for a future episode, give us a ring on the Bananphone at 725-FEELING, that’s 725-333-5464, or you can use the voice memo app on your phone to record your question and email it to us at thefeelingsclubpodcast@gmail.com. We'll also take all your jokes!