Our New Year’s Resolutions for Football in 2024

Football’s great - but it’s not perfect. As a new year rolls around, we thought it was a perfect time to decide on some resolutions that football should definitely adopt. All of them. Even the ridiculous ones.


Marcus, Jim, Luke and Vish bring some idea of their own, from shot clocks and sartorial guidance to fundamentally destroying the fabric of the game. Plus, we sift through a boatload of suggestions from you lovely lot, which mainly focus on spanking and Gary Neville’s goalgasm.


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