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Ancient wisdom is about as good as wisdom gets. It’s been around forever and never ages. The classics section just might be more valuable then the self help section. So what can a bunch of dead old wise guys have to say? Beliefs are what upsets you, not the event. The book, The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday says anyone you love can leave you. Terrible, right? Absolutely, it feels like everything is gone. But what if you found out later that person committed the most vile crimes to their previous relationships? Now do feel about them leaving you? Not bad, bullet dodged. So them leaving you wasn’t actually the problem here. What happened? Your beliefs were overridden to what was more important. If you got fired from your job but you hated it anyway and believe you can easily get another one then it was a blessing. But not if you loved your job and never think you’ll ever get another one like it. It’ll be tough to bear because we attached our beliefs by what we value. The ancient philosophers say there’s not events that are good or bad, just the ones we are perceptive to. Shakesspeare said, “Nothing either good nor bad but thinking makes it so.” He’s essentially saying this happened to me but not something *bad* happened to me. If you stop at the first part, you’ll have more perseverance and have more optimism when bad things happen. This does sound too simple, as the ancient philosophers were adapted from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy by Albert Ellis. It’s used to help does dealing with anger, depression, and other negative emotions. Irrational beliefs are where most of the negative emotions come from So when’re dealing with negative emotions, think about the event but not what caused it. Ask yourself what are your beliefs about the event and are they logical? If my wife leaves me, it’ll haunt me forever. If I get fired, I’ll never recover. If I don’t write this book, then I’ll question where my life is going. Maybe third one is true for me, but the other two are completely irrational. That’s where the negative emotions draw from. By changing belief can change feelings. If she leaves me, I can find someone else. If it happened before then the effect isn’t permanent. So this happens when you’re overcoming sadness and anger, but what about anxiety of the future? Do your best now, don’t worry about anything else. In a way this is like the serenity prayer. “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference.” This started by Reinhold Nieburh in 1934, but the ancient philosophers have said the same thing 200 centuries before. Now control was a big part of society back in the ancient B.C. days, but they were modest in what they needed. They essentially always asked the question, “Can I do anything about this?” Do it if you can, but don’t stress if you can’t. The philosophers say a lot of the negative problems in our lives comes from the things we try to have control over but really don’t. This causes stress and anxiety in a false sense of control. If you focus the energy on the things you do have control of, then you’ll have more happiness and lasting achievements. So ask yourself the question, “Do I have control over this?” If you don’t, then don’t worry about it. So you’re belief is causing all this problems. Which is all irrational. So the negative emotions aren’t irrational and not the correct way to behave. So you’re probably wondering what is the right way then? Be more proactive and accepting No one likes to instantly accept something. It correlates to settling which feels like you’re getting less than what you deserve. But let’s think of it this way: What do you think is the opposite of accept? It’s denying, as in denial which no one wants to be. Albert Ellis wanted to remove the word ‘should’ because we would be overall more happier. ‘Should’ makes us value our expectations over the reality. Traffic shouldn’t be slow at this time. It shouldn’t be raining in California. My kids shouldn’t be misbehaving. Denial is another aspect of irrational emotion which is where negative emotions come from. So we need to accept reality. You accept the bad traffic, it’s there. Being in denial doesn’t change anything, but that doesn’t mean you can’t plan your trips accordingly. By accepting might means settling to us, but it should mean accepting facts for what they are. The problem lies in how want things to be and have to settle when it doesn’t happen. This may protect us from the worst, but they also lock us from the amazing opportunity to become great. The philosophers say not to waste energy fighting something you don’t have control of. Let’s just embrace it and see how we can deal with it the best of our ability. So, next time things are looking grim, don’t deny it. It’s there. Then see what you can do about it. Actions will then be rational then. That’s how the situation turns into it’s raining now my day is ruined because we can’t go to the park. To really It’s raining, lets go watch a movie. So, how does this improve your life? *Choose who you will be* Most problems originate in your head. Not only that but from other people as well. We’re not alone in this world. There’s so much to learn from. That’s why we have amazing quotes like: We don’t choose who are parents are, but we can choose who we want to be. Anders Erricson, most famous for saying to be an expert is to require 10,000 hours into a given subject has said it’s so important to have a mentor. Talking to someone who ultimately want to do or just admire. Having this person identify what you should be doing so you can have the desire level of performance. So when you have a challenge in your hands, think about what would they do. This can have the effect to really change an outcome. People you look up to are extremely helpful. But how do you get from really improving? Mentors are really people who are more experienced than you at something that you can talk to. Every ancient philosopher we know had one if not multiple. Having daily rituals are essential Daily rituals can really improve your life. But what did the philosophers recommend? Rituals in the morning and evening. So you can be ready for your day and how to reflect on how that day went. So they thought: Today is what you’ll be facing rather than what the average person tends to do which is list down what their problems are and try to do them. They don’t attachments into these problems when they’re going through a list. They also recommend meditation which is an amazing way to deal with stress. Most importantly, they didn’t believe in perfectionism. They new progress was a journey and you can always get better. It’s where the quote ’As long as you live, learning how to live.’ comes from. Don’t set your mind on things you don’t have but rather blessing and desires that are obtainable. What if I met my future wife? Future career? Future house? Practicing gratitude is a big impact among the philosophers because they make you realize how insignificant your problems are in the grand scheme of things. Anything new might be overrated. Sometimes ideas that are centuries old are still just as good as they are today.